ME: I’m completely insane. I even exhaust myself.
LUKE: You know, there are a lot of pretty girls in the world, but the hot ones are are always the damaged ones.
ME: Well, that’s very comforting, thank you… Ooh! I think I’m going to get the smoked salmon with buckwheat blinis and caviar.
LUKE: Mmm…No darling. Look at the price. That’s way too inexpensive. They’re using cheap caviar. I won’t allow it.
ME (whining): It sounds so good!
LUKE: Nope. Not good. Friends don’t let friends eat cheap caviar. Pick something else.
ME: Sigh… all right…
LUKE (to the waitress): We’d like 12 of your West Coast oysters to start, and two more Proseccos please.
ME (clapping hands): Yippee! More champagne!
LUKE: Well, of course, silly!
MISS ANTHROPE'S HOUSE OF HIGH DRAMA 