Me:You don’t need coke.
P.:I do, I do need coke. I totally need coke and I need it right now.
Me:You’re not doing coke! Don’t be an idiot.
P:Goddamnit, just one line! You bitch, I know you know where to get it!
Me:No! I hate coke, I’m not getting it and you’re not doing it.
P. (grabbing me by the shirt and shoving his face into mine):Please, please, PLEASE!!!!
Me (slapping him across the face):Snap out of it, you big mary! You’re not doing any coke!!
P. (visibly calmer, mouth wide open in shock):Oh my God, that was amazing. I love you.
Me:I love you too. Now sip your damn drink.